I don't even know how to start this posting, so I'll just say it.  Today's ultrasound showed TWO BABIES!!!  TWINS... DOS... DOUBLES!!  I'm in shock, but I'm not surprised... I had a feeling there would be two!  I can't stop giggling tonight; I'm hysterically laughing as I type this!  Fortunately, Lee was with me at the appointment.  After the initial "oh my gosh!!" I started sobbing and was so glad he was there to hold my hand.  He was smiling from ear to ear!

One of the babies, "Twin A" only had a heart rate of 86 BPM, while "Twin B" had a BPM of 116.  They want the beats-per-minute to be over 100, and Dr. R said it's too early to tell.  It could be that Twin A implanted a little later than B and he/she is younger, or this could mean there is something wrong.  The next ultrasound in 2 weeks will tell, and at that time my rate of miscarrying goes from 40% to 5% then!  It's going to be a looong 2 weeks!!  Like Dr. R said, don't count Twin A out yet!  I really think he/she will make it! 

Okay, I'm going to end this early because I am exhausted from all the wonderful news!!!  Please say double prayers for our double joys!

Love,
Chelle

Pregnancy is going great!  After a couple weeks of very minimal nausea and other side effects, the nausea is starting to set in.  I was coasting along thinking I'm going to be one of those women who has no side effects!  I realized after I started reading a book called "Pregnancy 411" that it's too early for the side effects.  I found out I was pregnant when most people don't yet know!  I'm 5 weeks as of yesterday, and according to the book, the side effects really start around 8 weeks.  I wonder if the early symptoms are a precursor for a difficult pregnancy or if this is bad as it gets.  Time will tell!  All I know is yesterday I had a full waking day of nausea that was never relieved!  Telling myself "nausea is a good thing, nausea is a good thing!" is getting me through it!  I'll gladly except 9 months of nausea for a healthy baby... but you may want to avoid me during those months!

I have to do a little bragging on my dog, Banjo.  We've been doing injections every day for about six weeks now (my hips are not happy!) and up until 2 weeks ago we would kick the dogs out of the bathroom or bedroom while Lee administered them.  The dogs don't like to be separated from us by a door, so they would always whine and paw at the door.  Two weeks ago, they made their way to the bed and I told Lee it'll be fine, that I'll just hold on to Banjo so he doesn't attack him (he playfully attacks Lee sometimes when he hugs me or smacks my butt!).  Banjo just sat there, watching Lee patiently and curiously and since that night he has been my little support system.  As I walk to the bed to lay down for my nightly injection, Banjo beats me to it and lays down at the bottom of the bed.  I lay on him, hugging him while I get injected.  I know he feels my anxiety each time, and lays patiently, always with his eyes on Lee.  Last night, as I was walking to the bed, he was already laying there and rolled over on his back in such an adorable, submissive manor!  I laid down and hugged him; afterwards he always gives me a kiss after I tell him "good boy!"  He trots off afterwards looking so proud of himself!  It's amazing how therapeutic dogs are!  It'll be interesting to see how they both respond as the pregnancy goes along. 

Lee started his new job on Tuesday and so far, so good!  He breezed through his test on Wednesday and is finally a licensed contractor!  It's been super busy for both of us at work lately and we are counting down the days till our vacation in the Outer Banks in September.  It's funny how vacation always comes when you need it most!

Please say a little prayer that my ultrasound goes well on Monday and everything will look as it should!  Hopefully I'll be able to find out how many babies are brewing inside me!

XOXO,
Chelle

My final pregnancy test was done on Wednesday (I did a total of 4) and my ultrasounds are scheduled for August 17th and August 31st.  I believe on the 17th I'll be able to find out how many babies are in my belly!  It's been really hard to keep quiet about my pregnancy; I want to shout it from the rooftop!!  I got a letter this weekend saying all my medications can be stopped on September 11th, which is PERFECT timing!!  That's the day we leave for the East Coast for a week at the beach with family and I thought I was going to have to bring all my meds, syringes, sharps container, etc.  I haven't cried in awhile from the injections, but Lee is running out of room.  I have so many knots in my hip/butt area!  Banjo has been my little supporter with the injections; I lay on the bed and he either sits down on front of me and I hold onto him or he lays down and I'll hug him while Lee sticks me.  It's so sweet how he can sense something is stressful and is there to comfort me.

I've been wanting to update my blog for a few days, but have been so tired!  I have zero energy lately and it's been a bit frustrating.  I want to crawl straight into bed when I get home at 6:30, but I have dinner to cook and dogs to entertain, so I don't have that option which is probably a good thing.  Lee's been working 12 hour days, 7 days a week for awhile, so dinners are up to me.  My in-laws have been great and have fed us a lot lately, which has been nice!  I've been told your energy comes back in your second trimester, so I'm trying to be patient.  I read recently it's crucial to keep up with exercise when pregnant for the baby's brain so I need to figure out a way to incorporate walks each day, which is about all the exercise I'm allowed now.  With the research I've done on pregnancy, I've realized I have so much to learn and I'm awaiting several books I ordered on pregnancy and the baby's first year.  I want to do everything right for that baby(s)!

Other than the tiredness (and constipation, which sucks, but I won't go into that!) I'm feeling really good!  Last Sunday, while sitting in church, one lady was asking for prayers for her vertigo and as she was talking I was trying to figure out why I felt like I had vertigo as well!  That night we ate dinner at Ken & Lynn's and I was dizzy again.  I googled dizziness and pregnancy and learned it is common and means your blood vessels are expanding.  Apparently it's a very common symptom according to friends, but I had never heard of it!  My father-in-law made ribs that night, which is my favorite thing he grills, but nausea hit me right before dinner and I didn't have much of an appetite.  Since Sunday I've only had very miniscule nausea that occurs only if I don't eat often, and mild dizziness. 

Anxiety has been probably the worst side effect for me, and I'm not sure if I worry more now or I'm just more aware of it.  When I feel myself getting stressed, I take slow deep breaths and I've noticed myself doing that a lot lately.  I know worrying only does harm and things are out of my control, but I can't help but worry often if the baby is still alive, doing well, getting enough nutrients, etc.  I don't want to rush time, but I can't wait for my first ultrasound to see it/them and know everything appears well.  I feel more comforted when I have cramping, nausea or dizziness; I feel like it's my body telling me "yes, Michelle, you're still pregnant!"

As many of you know, Lee's grandmother passed away on Tuesday.  She lived a very long life and has been ready to go for some time, but we all miss her.  Last Sunday, I passed by her room thinking she was asleep and her caregiver said "I think she's calling for you, is your name Sue?"  I went into her room and she was awake and smiling.  I told her hello and kissed her.  I said "I guess you've heard the news, we're pregnant!"  I'll never forget how much her face lit up then; she seemed so happy!  Her caregiver said "that's the first thing she told me when I got here yesterday."  I had to hold back tears!  I wish she would be here to meet our baby(s), but I am so happy she knew we were expecting before she passed away. 

Keep your prayers going for baby(s) Stewart!  My birthday is October 1st, which is one day short of the last day of my first trimester!  Last Friday was my 4 week pregnancy mark and my due date is April 9th.  I'm going to officially announce my pregnancy on my birthday!  I couldn't ask for a better gift this year!!!

Love,
Chelle

Yesterday was a whirlwind!  I went to the hospital, beside my work, and had my blood test done by 10am; plenty of time for my doctor's office to get the results before they closed at 1pm.  The lady who drew my blood said the results would be ready within the hour.  I was in clinic at work the rest of the morning and constantly checked my phone in between patients.  By noon I was getting worried!  I told my head nurse "something's not right, why haven't they called me?!"  She explained they are probably like us and crazy busy.  I jokingly told her she was wrong, that's it's all about me, and their sole responsibility that day was getting my results.  I finally couldn't take it anymore so I called my coordinator at 12:30pm.  She had just called the hospital ten minutes prior and the results weren't ready!  I instantly was worried I wouldn't get the results that day!  Then she told me "I can tell you that your test on Wednesday was positive, your levels were really high, so you're pregnant!"  I think I responded with "Oh my gosh!!" in a surprised tone!  I wasn't really surprised, just wanted to know if they were sure!

A couple of people asked me this week if I feel pregnant.  I told them it's too soon to have symptoms, and thought I have no idea what being pregnant even feels like, but I sensed I was.  I was a little sad that my breast pain went away after the follicle stimulating hormones and I had no other symptoms to indicate I was.  I should be careful what I wish for!!  On Thursday, while I was getting ready around 6am, all of a sudden a huge wave of nausea and a hot flash came over me and I had to stop what I was doing and go outside to cool down.  I was in shorts and a tank top, and even the cool morning air wasn't cool enough for me.  The nausea sort of went away, but I couldn't finish my coffee.  That morning at work I kept getting mild waves of nausea that were relieved by eating little bites of fruit here and there.  I told Lee I'd be surprised if my test was negative and his response was "the nausea could be from anything!"  Mr. Optimist had suddenly turned into Mr. Pessimist!  I kept telling him to "think positive!"  I think he didn't want to get his hopes up and wasn't going to believe it until it was confirmed.

Once I got off the phone with my coordinator, I immediately called Lee to tell him the partial news.  I told him my test was positive from Wednesday, but they were waiting on the results from that day, and as long as my numbers are still going up, then I am pregnant.  He yelled "woohoo!" then said "I have to go, I'm in the middle of a work crisis."  Work crisis?!  Hello, I said we are PREGNANT!!!  I learned later he was at a job with several workers, standing outside a locked house because no one told the homeowners they were going to be there that day and he had to figure out what to do with each guy.  He told me to call him when I heard back from Karen, so once I heard, I texted him and said my levels are even higher.  I didn't want to call him again because he seemed stressed, so I thought a text was best.  I sent the group text to him and my mother about the second result and he asked if that meant we were having twins.  I told him not necessarily and I'll explain later.  My mother and I proceeded to talk in Emojicons.  When I got home to greet him he asked "so are you pregnant?  I don't understand pictures."  He didn't understand that my high level of HCG that day meant I was pregnant (even though I thought I had explained it well), and I guess he needed to hear "I'm definitely pregnant!"  I told him he should've called me!  Here I am telling my closest friends and family and my husband didn't even fully understand?!

We didn't do any big celebration last night (I was exhausted from all the happy emotions), but we hugged a bunch, made dinner together and relaxed.  We already referred to each other as "Mama" and "Daddy" with the dogs, but we started calling each other "Baby Mama" and "Baby Daddy."  We talked about when the due date would be if we had one baby or two, and about how cool it would be to have twins, but we'd be happy with just one.  Realization started to set in, and we talked about how much we have to do in 8-9 months!  Our kitchen is our biggest stress (nasty, broken tile, gross old cabinets, spaces between things where we've removed cabinets or appliances, a stove sitting by itself without a cabinet, a huge gap between the old tile and new hardwood we laid, etc) and we somehow have to figure out how to have it done before baby!  We finally agreed we'd "figure it out" and went back to the happy celebratory state!

There has been so much good news lately in our lives it seems God is answering prayer after prayer!  Lee hasn't been happy with his job for a long time and the commute has been killing him (plus our finances!).  Out of the blue last week, he got a call from a contractor who is located in Scotts Valley (where his parent's live) who wanted to interview him.  He was given Lee's resume by the designer of Lee's parent's kitchen after Lee renovated it two years ago.  Lee had an interview with him on Tuesday evening and was told Wednesday morning he got the job!!  This contractor has been in business about ten years, mostly works in Santa Cruz County (i.e. close to home!) and has so much work he's having to turn down some.  We checked him out online and he has proper licensing and a clean record.  He is starting Lee at the same pay he was making "over the hill" as we call it, in San Jose and after six months, he starts accumulating vacation time!  His current boss started doing that two years ago, but it only lasted for six months so any time Lee has to take off, it's unpaid.  Lee is taking his test in three weeks for his contractor's license, and was going to wait until the after the test to look for another job, but this one fell into his lap!  Lee's a bit overwhelmed by everything right now.  On top of this, he's currently renovating his parent's bathrooms after work and on weekends.  Even though it's all good news, I think his already scattered brain is overloaded!

Hopefully once he starts his new job and takes his test he will settle down.  I myself have been in a state of euphoria since the transfer and hope I can continue this feeling!  I went back to work on Wednesday after having an anxious day on Tuesday and completely dreading returning, but it hasn't been so bad.  There is so much drama/tension/anger/stress with people there and the vibe isn't good, but I'm trying to keep myself in a bubble and not let other's drama get to me because it has nothing to do with me.  My baby(s) is the most important thing right now, and I'm making sure to take care of myself.  I allow myself one cup of coffee in the morning (which my doctor said was totally fine) and only take medications prescribed by my doctor, plus prenatal vitamins and extra folic acid.  I'm allowed to take Zyrtec, but have been trying to only take it a few times a week.  I haven't had wine in weeks and the break from drinking feels nice (but I do still crave it!).  I already drink plenty of water and I stocked up on ginger ale, which I think will be my new best friend if/when the nausea hits.

I believe my doctor said once the pregnancy tests are done (I have another tomorrow and my final one on Tuesday) I'll be able to lift over ten pounds.  Banjo has done great getting himself in and out of the truck, but Kazoo is another story.  Even though she can launch in and out of Lee's big truck with no problem, she looks at me with her big doe eyes as if to say "carry me, Mom" when she's in mine.  I've spoiled her too much, but I do miss carrying her around!  Lee has gotten better at the injections, but it's hard to believe I have 7-9 weeks left of them!  After the first few days of absolutely dreading the injections and severe pain, all of a sudden I could barely feel them going in and the pain afterwards wasn't there.  I got a little cocky after that thinking they would no longer hurt, until Lee hit a nerve and numbness went down my leg.  Some days I don't feel it, some days I yell in pain.  I have knots in both hips and currently my right cheek feels like I'm carrying a ten pound painful weight in it, but it's all manageable and totally worth it!!!  I know he will be relieved once we're done with injections!

Thanks to all who congratulated me yesterday, hugged me, praised God with me and cried with me!!  I have been waiting so long to be able to say "I'm pregnant!" and it felt good, although still so surreal.  Every time I think about it I smile, and every time I speak about it, I cry!  I know I have a ways to go until I'm officially in the "safe zone" in three months, and until then, it isn't Facebook official, just our little secret!

Please continue to keep our sweet baby(s) in your prayers and pray that they continue to grow healthy and strong!

Love,
Chelle